13/07/2022
: English? Not so simple.
Homographs are words of like spelling but with more than one meaning. A homograph that is also pronounced differently is a heteronym. Do you think that English is easy? I think a bored retired English teacher put this together. THIS IS GREAT! Please enjoy it and read it all the way to the end. This took a lot of work to put together!
1. The bandage was *wound* around the *wound*.
2. The farm was used to *produce produce*.
3. The dump was so full that it had to *refuse* more *refuse*.
4. We must *polish* the *Polish* furniture.
5. He could *lead* if he would get the *lead* out.
6. The soldier decided to *desert* his *dessert* in the *desert*.
7. Since there is no time like the *present*, he thought it was time to *present* the *present*.
8. A *bass* was painted on the head of the *bass* drum.
9. When shot at, the *dove dove* into the bushes.
10. I did not *object* to the *object*.
11. The insurance was *invalid* for the *invalid*.
12. There was a *row* among the oarsmen about how to *row*.
13. They were too *close* to the door to *close* it.
14. The buck *does* funny things when the *does* are present.
15. A seamstress and a *sewer* fell down into a *sewer* line.
16. To help with planting, the farmer taught his *sow* to *sow*.
17. The *wind* was too strong to *wind* the sail.
18. Upon seeing the *tear* in the painting, I shed a *tear*.
19. I had to *subject* the *subject* to a series of tests.
20. How can I *intimate* this to my most *intimate* friend?
Let's face the real sense of it, English is a crazy language. There is no *egg* in *eggplant* or *ham* in *hamburger*; neither *apple* nor *pine* in *pineapple*. English *muffins* weren't invented in *England* or *French* fries in *France*. *Sweetmeats* are *candies* while *sweetbreads*, which aren't sweet, are *meat*. We take English for granted but if we explore its paradoxes, we find that *quicksand* can work *slowly*, *boxing rings* are *square* and a *guinea pig* is neither from *Guinea* nor is it a *pig*.
And why is it that *writers write* but *fingers* don't *fing*, *grocers* don't *groce* and *hammers* don't *ham*? If the plural of *tooth* is *teeth*, why isn't the plural of *booth* be *beeth*? One *goose*, 2 *geese*. So one *mouse*, 2 *meese*? One index, 2 *indexes*? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make *amends* but not one *amend*? If you have a bunch of *odds* and *ends* and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
If teachers *taught*, why didn't preachers *praught*? If a *vegetarian* eats *vegetables*, what does a *humanitarian* eat? Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people *recite at a play* and *play at a recital*? *Ship by truck* and *send cargo by ship*? *Have noses that run* and *feet that smell*?
How can a *slim chance* and a *fat chance* be the same, while a *wise man* and a *wise guy* are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your *house can burn up* as it *burns down*, in which you *fill in* a form by *filling it out* and in which, an alarm *goes off* by *going on*.
English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human *race* which, of course, is not a *race* at all. That is why, when the stars are *out* they are *visible* but when the lights are *out* they are *invisible*.
PS: Why doesn't *buick* rhyme with *quick*?
You lovers of the English language might enjoy this. There is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meanings than any other two-letter word. That is *UP*. It is easy to understand *UP* meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we awake in the morning, why do we wake *UP*?
At a meeting, why does a topic come *UP*? Why do we speak *UP* and why are the officers *UP* for election and why is it *UP* to the secretary to write *UP* a report? We call *UP* our friends and we use it to brighten *UP* a room, polish *UP* the silver; we warm *UP* the leftovers and clean *UP* the kitchen.
We lock *UP* the house and some guys fix *UP* the old car. At other times the little word has real special meaning. People stir *UP* trouble, line *UP* for tickets, work *UP* an appetite and think *UP* excuses.
To be dressed is one thing, but to be dressed *UP* is special. A drain must be opened *UP* because it is stopped *UP*. We open *UP* a store in the morning but we close it *UP* at NIGHT. We seem to be pretty mixed *UP* about *UP*! To BE knowledgeable about the proper uses of *UP* look the word *UP* in the DICTIONARY.
In a desk-sized dictionary, it takes *UP* almost one quarter of the pages and can add *UP* to about thirty definitions.
If you are *UP* to it, you might try building *UP* a list of the many ways *UP* is used. It will take *UP* a lot of your time, but if you don't give *UP*, you may wind *UP* with a hundred or more.
When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding *UP*, but when the sun comes out we say it is clearing *UP*. When it rains, it wets the earth and often messes things *UP*, when it doesn't rain for awhile, things dry *UP*. One could go on and on, but I'll wrap it *UP* for now as my time is *UP* so... it is time to shut *UP*!
Now, it's *UP* to you to decide what you are *UP* to with this post.
*Beautiful English*
