08/10/2021
SIGNS THAT YOUR MARRIAGE IS HEALTHY
1. You still celebrate your Anniversary
2. You still laugh and joke
3. You know each other's past without the fear of judgment
4. You don't snoop on each other, you don't investigate each other's phone, Facebook, clothes, you trust each other
5. You have disagreements but don't get scared that disagreements mean the death of your love. You make up quickly
6. You don't have things you can't talk about, no topic is a no go zone, you don't keep secrets from each other
7. You both feel valued
8. You don't have s*x to prove your love is OK, you don't hide behind s*x. Many couples have a pathetic bond but console themselves all is well because the s*x is great
9. You two are best friends, not just lovers
10. You don't feel self-conscious about your body or your body marks around each other
11. You don't always have to talk when you're in the same room. Sometimes love is spoken in silence, sometimes a cuddle or a stare of love is enough
12. You speak the language of touch and kiss even when s*x is not the agenda. He rubs her hand as she talks, she kisses his cheek to say thank you, he holds her waist when he finds her in the kitchen, she squeezes his hand when he feels lost
13. You feel empowered to correct each other
14. You can look at each other's eyes or listen to the tone of voice and know if your spouse is OK, sick, happy, tired, annoyed, disturbed; you are an open book to each other
15. You still tease each other, flirt, s***k each other, and are still playful
16. You inform each other of your day's schedule. Being busy doesn't unsettle any of you
17. You don't struggle to communicate, you don't look for the right words, your heart is in the right place and so you speak from the heart
18. You affirm each other and let each other know they are loved and cared for
19. You still make wow moments together that add to your sweet memories
20. You face challenges together, none feels alone
21. You don't feel used or that you are doing too much
22. You don't feel ashamed to ask for your spouse's help even if you have done so many times already. You don't feel you are a burden
23. You are naked spiritually, emotionally, financially and unashamed, you truly know each other
24. Tears are not something you hide from each other
25. You take advantage of any opportunity or time to be together no matter how brief
26. Your spouse is the first person you think of when something good or bad happens, first person you share it with
27. You still pray together
28. You witness each other's failures, weaknesses, mistakes and sins yet still remain together, covering each other and bettering each other
29. You have secret codes, phrases and names that only the two of you know the meaning and history of
30. You tidy each other up; she straightens his tie, he wipes the particle on her face, he zips her dress for her, she advises him on what to wear
31. You share with each other truths, videos and articles that better your lovelife
32. You love to catch up on how the day has been
33. You don't always talk about love, parenthood and romance; you also talk about issues, current affairs, business, topics affecting society and even have a healthy debate or discussion
34. You never threaten to leave in order to get your way in the marriage. You don't use blackmail or the information your spouse confided in you to advance your selfish agenda
35. You feel really bad when you hurt each other and are quick to apologize and forgive
36. You still find ways to please each other and make each other smile
37. You make decisions together
© Dayan Masinde and Akello Oliech
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