14/02/2026
💕 LOVE IN ALL FORMS FEATURE #7 💕
TAGU-TAGUAN
Totoo pala yung sabi nila.
Madaling magbigay ng advised, madaling sabihin na, take the risk or lose the chance.
Madalas nasasabi natin sa mga pamilya natin lalo na sa mga kaibigan natin, na sa tuwing magsasabi sila na may gusto silang tao o pangarap na gustong magkaroon ng pag-ibig, madali nating nasasabi na "subukan mo kaseng isapalaran, wala naman mawawala kapag sumubok ka."
Tapos minsan nagagalit tayo kapag nakikita natin na naduduwag sila at mas pinipiling wag nalang ituloy sa kadahilanang natatakot sila baka layuan sila, o masira lang yung pagsasamahan na una ng nabuo kapag umamin sila. Kase ganun naman diba, once we take the risk, either pwedeng maging kayo or pwedeng mawala kung ano yung meron kayo. Haysssst.
Oo nga pala. Bago ako magdrama, nakalimutan ko palang magpakilala.
Hi, ako 'to. Si Natoy, ay este P. Oo, ako ‘to si P, or inshort love, mahal, babe, baby, yum, honey bunch, honey cake, or kahit anong itawag mo sakin, basta totoo yang nararamdaman mo.
Mahirap naman kapag love tawag sayo pero hindi ikaw yung mahal, diba?
Mahirap din naman na kapag honey tawag sayo, pero may iba na pala siyang bee?
Baby pero sa iba nag papahele?
Yum pero sa iba nasasarapan. Haysssst. Buhay nga naman!
Pero kidding aside, oo ako nga ‘to si P.
Masipag pumasok.
Study first e.
Pano ba naman, 2 years delayed nako sa pag graduate, hindi paba mag fofocus?
Kidding aside. One normal day nung papasok ako. And I saw this one person who's not very attractive but the face was too angelic. At first, gusto ko lang siyang tignan at titigan, but as I started to stare to that face, I felt something I wasn’t supposed to feel.
Simula nung makita ko yung muka niya, I can't help myself not to think about it. Simula non, kakain akong naka ngiti, nag uurong akong naka ngiti, kahit ang totoo hindi naman talaga ako nag uurong, tapos 10am pa pasok ko, pero 9am nandito nako sa school para lang masilayan siya. Ang weird. Huyyyyy!!! ang weird mo. Ay ako pala. I started to feel something strange the moment I saw that face. I don’t know what this kind of feelings. Is it a love, infatuation or puppy love? Haysssst basta ang gulo. What I only want that time is to always feel his presence.
Foundation day came. At dahil gusto ko siyang palaging nakikita, I decided to make friend sa mga kaibigan niya, nagpapansin ako na hindi naman dapat pero ginawa ko para lang makita siya palagi, until unexpected things happened. That person approached me, as a leader in our department, the intention was pure concern about specific event. Syempre, dahil patay malisya, the kilig inside me is killing me, that person is just talking about their concern, oo naiintindihan ko siya, pero para akong lumilipad sa kalawakan while listening to him. Simula nung araw nayon, lumakas yung kutob ko, na totoo tong nararamdaman ko. Hindi siya joke.
As time pass by, palagi ko na siyang nakakasama, nakikita hanggang sa nagkaroon ako ng mga bagong kaibigan, at ganun din siya. Tapos dahil halos magkakakilala lang mga kaibigan namin, unti-unti kaming nagkakilala hanggang sa naging circle of friends kami. Opo, naging magkaibigan kami. Hindi ko alam kung matutuwa ba ako dahil kaibigan ko na siya at lagi ko nang nakakasama or dapat akong malungkot kase baka hanggang kaibigan nalang kami.
Past forward, dahil eto na nga. I can’t resist myself on not thinking about the circumstances. So, I started to confess. Opo, nag confess ako, but not to him. Syempre, ano ako si darna na lulunok nalang ng bato tapos biglang lalakas ang loob? Dzuuuuh. Diko kayaaaa. Nag confess ako, oo, pero sa kaibigan ko. I told her everything. I told her na, I like that person very much. To the point na halos, andami ko nang naiimagine kasama siya, kakain ng kikkiam at fishball tapos magsusubuan kamiiii. Aaaaaaccckk, so cringe, diba? Pero bakit ba, imagination ko yon e. Hahahaha! Kung na weweirdohan ka, ako rin. Kase hindi naman ako sanay ma fall into someone tapos ganon ka deep. To be honest, I’m not a fan of that love thing. Yang kilig-kilig nayan, I taught kagagawan lang yan ng mga delusional niyong utak, not until I felt that feeling na it’s sucking me deep into the bottom of my feet. Na para bang sobrang oa kona ng sobra para mag isip ng mga bagay na out of my control.
So eto na nga, since I confessed my feelings. My friend advised me the same advised I always give sa tuwing ako yung nagbibigay ng advised. At first ang weird, hindi ko naisip na yun din pala yung sasabihin niya, at kahit yun yung palagi kong sinasabi sa iba, kapag sayo na pala sinabi, mapapasabi ka nalang na, ang hirap palaaaaa. Oo, madaling tanungin yung would you take the risk or lose the chance?
Habang iniisip ko ‘yon, hindi ko alam anong susunod na hakbang ang gagawin ko. Andami kong tanong sa isip ko. Aamin ba ako? Pag umamin bako, may chance ba na magustuhan niya ko? O baka pag umamin ako, lalayuan niya ako, pandidirian niya ako, hindi niya nako kausapin, hindi niya nako pansinin, or worse baka masira pagkakaibigan namin. Mga tanong na bumagabag sakin habang iniisip ko yung tanong na take the risk or lose the chance. Aaaaccck bakit ang hirap?
Alam ng lahat na kapag may isa akong gusto, lahat ng paraan ginagawa ko para lang makuha ko. Pero lintek. Iba pala 'to. Iba pala kapag ikaw na yung tinamaan. Huhuhu. Hindiii ko alam.
Habang tumatagal, nalulungkot ako, ayokong umamin sakanya kase ayoko ring masira yung pagkakaibigan namin. So, I decided not to confess. Tiniis kong wag sabihin lahat. Sa tuwing lumalabas kami, hindi ko maiwasan na wag mailing habang nag uusap kami. Sa tuwing may gagawin kami, hindi ko maiwasan na maging concious sa lahat ng galaw ko, thinking na baka anytime mapansin niya na iniiwasan ko siya.
Habang tumatagal, unti-unti kong naitatago yung nararamdaman ko. Until I met someone who became my official lover. And Saturday, nagkaroon kami ng night swimming as a friends and nagplano kaming mag overnight, nagkaroon ako ng way para ipakilala yung lover ko. Past forward, I noticed something habang lumalalim ang gabi, nagkakasiyahan kami at dahil halos tipsy na kaming lahat, lumalabas yung pagiging clingy ng bawat isa samin, until my lover put his hands on my shoulder showing he cared about me and asking if kaya kopa ba. Before I responded, I noticed him na tumayo at umalis. I thought he’s going to the comfort room until hanggang matapos kami, hindi na siya bumalik and since were a bit tipsy, natulog na kami at hinayaan nalang.
The following days, napapansin ko, kapag mag aaya yung circle of friends naming na kumain sa labas, kapag sasama ako, palagi siyang may reason para hindi sumama. Tapos kapag ako naman yung wala, palagi siyang kasama. Na para bang iniiwasan niya ako. Kapag nagkwekwentuhan parang iniiwasan niya ko ng tingen. At first, hindi ko alam yung gagawin. Nagtataka ako, may nagawa bako? Na offend koba siya? O may nasabi bakong maliii. Haysssst.
Past forward, February 14. As usual, valentine’s celebration. I’m not expecting anything, dahil nasabihan ko naman yung lover ko na I don’t want anything, kase hindi naman ako materialistic na tao. I’d rather have 1 sack of rice than having that expensive flower, cake and chocolates. Ewan ko, weird ko.
Not until I received a bouquet of flowers with a letter attached. At first, I thought it came from my lover, kaya medyo nagalit ako ng konte na syempre kinilig din, dahil finally naramdaman ko yung feeling na “ganito pala pakiramdam kapag may nagbigay sayo ng flowers”, until I opened the letter. I was shocked,,, as in I was shockeddd to find out it was from someone, not to my lover. That someone was the person with the angelic face I first fell in love with. And here’s the exact letter.
—————-
My Moon
Hi!
How are you?
I hope life has been kind to you.
There were words I never dared to speak,
admiration folded me into silence,
not because I was afraid,
but because your too precious to risk breaking what already existed.
I was happy,
in the quiet wonder of seeing you,
in seconds turning to minutes,
minutes to hours,
each moment was enough
just knowing you were near.
Once, I wished you could be mine.
But time taught me a softer truth,
some loves are meant to be admired,
not owned.
Like the moon, most beautiful when watched from afar.
So, I stay here, quietly looking up,
content with distance,
grateful for the light you gave.
You will always be my moon,
and I hope the one who holds your hand
never forgets how lovely you are,
never breaks the heart I chose not to touch.
I leave without being heard,
smiling as I walk away,
wishing you a life full of happiness,
and a goodbye that shines just like you!
I will love you silently, from a distance.
Just like people love the moon.
And in the future, even if I got the opportunities to shine with the stars, I would still choose to sit under the rain, with you!
—————-
As I am reading the letters, my first reaction was “grabe hindi ko maintindihan.” Like legit, I know it has a meaning pero the tense I felt that way was way too far from what I have felt before. Binabasa ko siya pero hindi ko naiintidihan dahil ang nasa isip ko non, according to what is my understanding on his letter is he also like me. Hindi kona inintindi yung buong story ng message, basta ang alam ko, gusto niya rin ako. So, nag flash sakin lahat. Like legit bato? Akala ko nga prank lang, hanggang sa makalabas ako ng school at walang kumuha pabalik sakin ng bouquet. Likeeee, shoccccks. Legit, he like me? I was too blind not to notice it.
Nanlumo ako, I don’t know what to feel that way. At dahil mahal ko rin yung present ko and I respect what we currently have, I couldn’t help but ignore it and keep it buried deep inside me, only in my thoughts. Ang laking pang hihinayang, I was his mooooon. What if inamin kona pala sana noon, sana nagkaroon pa kami ng chance. What if umamin ako, edi sana siya yung kasama ko. What if, what if, what if. Walang katapusang what iffff!!!!!
HUHUHUHU!! Tama ka friend, sana nag take nalang ako ng risk, kase ang lake ng chance na nawala.
Outside, I was happy for him as he transferred and went into his dream school, sad on the other hand, because I was the reason. And deeply, I felt too much regret. Still what if, is still on my mind.